


This is How it Goes

by TechnoAngelWings



Category: Supernatural
Genre: (possibly...), Angst, Canon Rewrite, Coda, Fix-It, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Man i just need Jack and Cas and Dean to be a cute lil familyyyy, Post-Episode: s15e18 Despair, Smut, Song: This is How it Goes, Songfic, Spoilers, The Empty (Supernatural), they/them Jack cause I say so
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-10
Updated: 2020-11-09
Packaged: 2021-03-09 01:08:15
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,584
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27476305
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TechnoAngelWings/pseuds/TechnoAngelWings
Summary: Castiel is gone. He's gone and Dean is completely shellshocked. Having to comprehend that Billie was no longer a problem, the alternate universe people have disappeared, Cas was dead, and helovedhim, all in one day was overwhelming. How in hell was he supposed to figure all of this out?------Short songfic based around "This is How it Goes" by Stegosaurus Rex
Relationships: Castiel/Dean Winchester
Comments: 1
Kudos: 6





	This is How it Goes

_Such a quiet night_  
 _We keep alive, we keep us warm_  
 _Friendships last so long_  
 _Don’t know on what_  
 _How did we get here?  
  
\---------------------  
DEAN:  
  
_ **"I love you."  
** Those three words came out of Castiel's mouth and hit Dean right in the heart. Now, hours later, Dean sat, sobs wracking his body, contemplating so many different ways he could've responded. Cas had to die thinking Dean could never love him, but god... that wasn't true in the slightest. The hunter loved him more than anyone he could ever think of, although he never said it, leaving a large, sinking pit of regret in his stomach. He was so adamant on his "heterosexuality" for years, he knew he was in love with the angel, but he was too afraid to ever admit it.

Dean's phone started to ring. He let out a shaking breath, _he can't deal with this right now._ Slipping the cell out of his pocket, the text across the screen noted the call was from Sam. That could only mean bad news, bad news he was not nearly in the right headspace to receive. Usually the hunter would push through his own problems for the good of others, but not this time. The unanswered call made Dean feel so shitty, so broken (despite what Cas had told him) that he couldn't help breaking down again. Although the man's eyes were nearly cried dry, head was was aching, and lungs were burning he sobbed until he passed out. There he slept, uncomfortably slumped against the wall of the dungeon with tears drying on his face.  
 _\---------------------_  
 _SAM:  
  
  
_ Dean didn't answer his call... _Shit._ "Jack, we gotta get back to the bunker," Sam said, turning to said nephilim. Jack looked at their father with a concerned face. The older began walking towards their car, younger hustling behind to catch up. 

"What's wrong? Are Dean and Cas ok?" The boy asked, worry seeping very clearly into their voice. They and Sam slipped into the car and Sam passed his child a nervous look. Jack gave a curt nod and angled their head forward. The two hunters knew not to talk about it and hope that their family was ok. At this point, just about anything could've happened to them and that was a scary thought.

Finally Sam and Jack reached the bunker, they've never hopped out of a car faster. Sam threw the door open, Jack close behind. The two hurried down the staircase, their shoes clanking against the steel structure. "Cas?! Dean?!" the nephilim shouted into the echoing front room. The older man followed his model and began calling names as well. "I'll go check their rooms!" Jack told their dad, who nodded in response. The angel scurried out of the meeting area, heading into the bedroom halls in attempt to find their other fathers. Sam took off in the direction of the kitchen, praying his brother and friend were at least alive.

The kitchen proved to be a dead end. Moose stopped to think, if his family was still alive and had been in trouble, where would they be that they couldn't hear him and Jack calling and could keep themselves safe. Well, that was many places in the bunker... but the most likely would be... **the dungeon!** Sam turned on his heel, dashing back into the front room, then under the arch that leads to the stairs. Stumbling down into the basement, the tall man stabilizes himself and stops in front of the door to the dungeon and archive room. There was a splintering dent in the middle of the door and it was slightly ajar. _Oh no._ Sammy slipped through the entry and immediately noticed a blood sigil painted on the back, one he wasn't keen to. _Double oh no._ He turned and the tall man's eyes panned over the room and they caught on a figure curled on the floor against the wall in the very back of the room. It was Dean. Although, Castiel seemed to be elsewhere.

Sam ran to Dean's side, inspecting him for any visible injuries. He didn't seem to be hurt at all, but a single, bloody red handprint was smudged onto the left shoulder of his brother's jacket. _Triple oh no._ Dean was still alive, just asleep. Sam had so many questions; He shook the older Winchester awake. "Dean!" he whisper-shouted. Said man groaned and grumbled, slowly sitting up as he rubbed his face of sleep. "Dean! Are you ok?" Dean's eyes were puffy and red, implying he had been crying. _Hard.  
_

"I-I," The shorter stuttered out. He paused for a moment, seeming to think about what had happened to him. It was clear he was fighting back tears he didn't have to spare. Sam reached out his hand placing it on the other's shoulder, causing him to look down and see the bloody handprint. Dean let out a hitching sob, head dropping.

"Oh god... Sammy... he.. he...," his body shook as he fell forward into Sam's arms.  
"Hey, hey...," the younger brother attempted to comfort Dean. He hardly sees the other man cry, and he had definitely never seen him this distraught. Something had to be seriously wrong and he was very concerned. "Do you want to talk about it? I'm trying to understand what's going on here." Dean sniffled and pushed himself back away from Sam. He was clearly forcing over-masculinity onto himself again, not allowing himself comfort. He coughed and forced himself straight, a stern look on his face. He began to explain.  
 _\---------------------_  
JACK:  
  
After shoving open all of the doors, it was made clear that Cas and Dean weren't there. Jack ran through the halls of the bunker, looking in bathrooms, storage room, living quarters, anything. They were starting to get stressed and scared that something horrible had happened. Jack eventually made their way back to the war room. They let out a short breath, unsure of where to go. The basement was a good bet, right? The blonde turned and entered the basement, hopping down the stairs and coming across the open door of the archive and dungeon. They ducked their head in, hearing Sam say, "Do you want to talk about it?" Jack shuffled quietly into the room.  
  
They could now see that Dean was slumped in his brother's arms. Cas didn't seem to be there, where was he? Jack looked around, hoping to see him pressed into a corner listening to the Winchester's conversation, but that didn't happen. Their attention was pulled back to the brothers as Dean coughed and sat up. "We... We went to Billie's library...," he said, breath shaking. "She was dying. She said she's not the one taking all of the refugees and then she said she wanted to-to kill me before she died." Jack began walking over to Sam and Dean, causing the younger to turn and the older to look up at him. The later man gave his son a sad smile. The nephilim sat down next to Sam.   
  
"Billie, um... she started trying to kill me," Dean explained further. "We got back here and... C-," Dean paused. "Cas, he put up that sigil and I-I was ok. Obviously, nothing could block her out f-forever though." The hunter took a deep breath, steadying himself. "Jack? Do, uh, what do you know about the deal? With the empty?" Jack got nervous. Had they caused Castiel's death? Was Cas dead?  
  


"I-I know that he made it to save me, and that he'd have to get taken by the empty. I did't know when...," Jack explained. Sam looked over at them, a sad look in his eyes. Dean let out a sigh.  
  


"Yea. Yea it was like that. He said the only way to kill Billie was to let the empty take her. I begged him not to, I did... He, um, Cas he called on the empty. Something about a-a link between them 'cause of the deal," Dean's voice was quiet and slow, like it was painful to get the words out. "The empty took him, and Billie too. He saved me. He saved us." Tears were flowing down Dean's face as he turned his head away from the other two. And Cas was dead. He was in the empty and it was Jack's fault.  
  


"I-I'm sorry... I'm so sorry! I didn't me-mean to," Jack was afraid Dean was mad at him, they didn't want him to be, not again. Dean looked sympathetically at the young boy, tears still streaming. Father hugged son, Sam soon to join. Jack had never experienced this much collective emotion from his fathers. They closed their eyes and hugged them back.   
  
"It's not your fault, Jack," Sam said. "Cas chose to do this." Jack laid their head against the older Winchester's shoulder and he ran a comforting hand down his back.  
"Sam's right, I'd never blame you, Jack," Dean said, sorrow still filling his voice. Dean had lost his best friend and Jack had lost their dad. The two grieved together, Sam watching over them.   
_\---------------------_  
Soon enough, the Winchesters had all dispersed around the bunker. Jack laying in their bed wondering if he was powerful enough again to bring Cas back. Dean drinking in the kitchen, contemplating what he would say if his angel was back. And Sam sitting in the library, concerned if everyone would be in the right space after Cas' death to be able to take down Chuck. This was one hell of a rough spot.

**Author's Note:**

> Hey! Stegosaurus Rex gets no love for anything other than "Nowhere to Run"! He's an amazing artist and has been working hard for YEARS to almost no credit. Please take a listen to "This is How it Goes" and maybe even some of his other music? :3 Sometimes it feels like I'm Max's only fan,,, Anyway see ya next chap! ~King


End file.
